We never fall out but...
Dec 7, 2019 16:58:56 GMT
Post by Humph on Dec 7, 2019 16:58:56 GMT
My wife and I rarely fall out about anything, we really don't, but once a year I just know that there will be a row.
Strangely enough, it involves the selection and purchase of the Christmas tree. There is a forest near us that sells them at this time of year and we have this annual tradition of an expedition to choose the tree. It's scheduled for next weekend.
It is incredibly well organised, with the separate "breeds" of tree ranked up by size, a hog roast, gluhwein stalls, Christmas music, a bonfire and so on.
It should be a fun thing. But let me tell you, it becomes a matter of international scale political crisis.
It can start quite well, in that we don't have high ceilings so our choice is restricted to 7' and under and the only other decisions should be the type and width. Trouble is, they have thousands of the beggars.
Now, having identified half a dozen or so potential candidates, I feel quite ready to make a decision after 20 minutes to half an hour including a swift pig roll, and a swig of boiled wine.
However, "she" needs to inspect, qualify, put on hold and/or reject at least 50 of the sodding things before deciding on "the" one.
Once this apparently critical decision has finally been made, it has to be photographed and circulated to other family members on social media for general and ultimate ratification. And we all know what happens when you ask for someone's opinion don't we? They bloody well give one.
Anyway, eventually, we come to a pinch point as we head towards the cash desks, and if there is any kind of queue, there are a dangerous few moments when the tree that has finally been selected has its validity questioned once again...
This is usually now some two hours into the miserable process and I am inevitably by now feeling preposterously angry, and can't actually begin to discuss it further.
I am assured though that this is a romantic outing which is looked forward to every year...
Strangely enough, it involves the selection and purchase of the Christmas tree. There is a forest near us that sells them at this time of year and we have this annual tradition of an expedition to choose the tree. It's scheduled for next weekend.
It is incredibly well organised, with the separate "breeds" of tree ranked up by size, a hog roast, gluhwein stalls, Christmas music, a bonfire and so on.
It should be a fun thing. But let me tell you, it becomes a matter of international scale political crisis.
It can start quite well, in that we don't have high ceilings so our choice is restricted to 7' and under and the only other decisions should be the type and width. Trouble is, they have thousands of the beggars.
Now, having identified half a dozen or so potential candidates, I feel quite ready to make a decision after 20 minutes to half an hour including a swift pig roll, and a swig of boiled wine.
However, "she" needs to inspect, qualify, put on hold and/or reject at least 50 of the sodding things before deciding on "the" one.
Once this apparently critical decision has finally been made, it has to be photographed and circulated to other family members on social media for general and ultimate ratification. And we all know what happens when you ask for someone's opinion don't we? They bloody well give one.
Anyway, eventually, we come to a pinch point as we head towards the cash desks, and if there is any kind of queue, there are a dangerous few moments when the tree that has finally been selected has its validity questioned once again...
This is usually now some two hours into the miserable process and I am inevitably by now feeling preposterously angry, and can't actually begin to discuss it further.
I am assured though that this is a romantic outing which is looked forward to every year...
)