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Post by tyrednexited on Nov 29, 2017 8:46:08 GMT
I had a very pleasant (if somewhat muddy) circular 11-mile stroll with friends around Derbyshire yesterday.
The return route was via Crich, with a café stop before returning to the car.
My hands were somewhat encrusted with what was probably mud, but given the field occupancy possibly not, accumulated from climbing stiles crossed by previous walkers, so as I passed the conveniences walking into the village, I decided to wash my hands before partaking of the inevitable baked products.
With my knees, after 11 miles of slipping and sliding I just about qualify for the disabled toilet, but I selected the standard unisex cubicle, and gave my hands a good wash.
I noted that the small cubicle had not one, but four separate bog-rolls! All of them were sparsely loaded, and the dispensing mechanism for each was simply a rather industrial looking spindled roll-holder. Each of the holders, however, had had a replacement spindle inserted, and each of these was secured by a conspicuously large, heavy-duty, brass padlock.
It wouldn't have taken me much more than 10 seconds to unroll all the paper from each of the rolls and stuff it in my pocket.
(Perhaps someone used to steal the spindles.......)
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Post by Deleted on Nov 29, 2017 9:51:50 GMT
Those Derbyshire people are not known for intelligence....
Reminds me...
Every week an old man in some South American country would cross the border into another with several donkeys carrying gooods. The customs officer was suspicious of the man, and checked the loads carefully, but everything was in order; the correct duty had been paid and there was no illegal contraband hidden away.
After many years, the old man announced that this was his last load, he was retiring. On his return from his last trip, the customs officer stopped him as he crossed back into his own country and said, 'Look, I have dealt with you every week for 30 years or more and I have always known that you have been smuggling something over the border, but each week, the paperwork has been perfect, the goods exactly as described and there has been nothing else hidden away despite careful searches. Am I right?'
The old man replied 'Yes, you are right! I have been smuggling.'
'What?' asked the customs officer
'Donkeys' replied the old man.
Clearly, if the story was told about Britain, the customs officer would be a Yorkshireman, the old man a Lancastrian...
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Post by tyrednexited on Nov 29, 2017 10:53:23 GMT
Clearly, if the story was told about Britain, the customs officer would be a Yorkshireman, the old man a Lancastrian... ....indeed; It would account for all those donkeys in Lancashire.....
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