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Post by tyrednexited on Mar 30, 2017 15:09:18 GMT
I'll rely on the smell to encourage them to make a decision. ...dangerous, dangerous.....
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Post by tyrednexited on Mar 30, 2017 15:14:02 GMT
I'll rely on the smell to encourage them to make a decision. ...I reckon you will be going in an MB-shaped coffin.....
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Post by Humph on Mar 30, 2017 15:21:13 GMT
They can put me in the bin as far as I'm concerned. 😉
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Post by Hofmeister on Mar 30, 2017 15:23:20 GMT
Coming from a large (and I mean large when my grandfather went, the cortege was so big and long Capital Radio sent the flying eye up to find out what was causing the jam) , east end clan, funerals were something to look forward to. Once when one of the matriarchs in Peterborough went (they were evicted from their council house in Canning Town so moved "to the country")the whole (and I mean all of it) of the newly built Holiday Inn was requisitioned for the wake. Fights would break out, I remember one happening at some hotel in Docklands over the fact that tinned salmon sandwiches were not on the menu. Someone ended up in the New Providence dock, the River police were called who were then promptly driven away by a hail of beer cans. There was always a couple or three births 9 months later (father unknown but likely to be a distant relative). Stories were told of the aggrieved husband being locked out from the home (During a home game against Spurs of all indignities) so aggrieved that he battered the door down with his head.
My mother was the last of the the matriarchs, long since devolved from the main rump, who over time have become so scattered and disparate that such gatherings are now consigned to history.
Mine will be a small affair, Cremation - non religious service with a celebrant, and a nice classy supper at a country hotel. Songs to be played at my funeral are
and by tradition, every male member of the family has it played at their funeral
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 30, 2017 22:11:33 GMT
Two in the last three months. Brother first (48yo) and then mother soon after.
Brother died without a will and mother (who was named as a beneficiary for some of his assets) soon after and before assets transferred. Guess how much paperwork and bureaucracy that involves.
Do your nearest and dearest a favour and make sure that you have a will that covers every eventuality.
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Rob
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Post by Rob on Mar 30, 2017 22:16:27 GMT
An interesting thread considering there's redundancies at work and I could at least try for voluntary redundancy. Life's too short to plod on in a job that at times is stressful and after we lose some people it will probably be worse.
So question is do I take the VR offer. It's not bad. Equivalent to nearly 2.5 years pay. Tax will then decimate it... well for the pedants it'll be worse than decimation of course.
As for funerals and mortality.... best not to think about it I guess.
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Post by tyrednexited on Mar 31, 2017 8:19:10 GMT
So question is do I take the VR offer. It's not bad. Equivalent to nearly 2.5 years pay. Tax will then decimate it... well for the pedants it'll be worse than decimation of course. ..... a question which, of course, only you can answer. I negotiated my exit a year after my fellow senior colleagues (following a change of top management) were "placed on the bench" to encourage them to leave. I escaped the cull at that point by a combination of luck, judicious preparation and "knowing where the bodies were buried", as I wasn't at that time ready to go. As a "hang over" from the previous management, I wasn't really wanted going forward, life was made "difficult" and a year later, as the last representative of the "old guard" my view was somewhat different. I finished at 56; I had always intended to finish at 60 so it was no great deal. I had enough interests to fill my leisure time, and had had a pretty gruelling (though very interesting and rewarding) period of my career for longer than I cared to remember. I was quite relishing a rest, but the old spectre of financial viability was (entirely unnecessarily as it happens) somewhere in there, along with the inevitable inertia. Driving to work on a Monday morning, expecting more sh*t, I was thinking, "I don't need this", and then I thought "and I really don't need this". With an exit payment, and other finances including my wife's, it was going to be relatively easy to bridge the gap to 60 (when I could take an un-reduced pension); the downside financially would be some loss of earnings (and the perks) in the interim, and 3+ years off my final pension. I had enough evidence to resign and put forward a good case for constructive dismissal (but, of course, no guarantee I would win), but the offer to HR to do it the "easy way" or the "hard way" didn't require any consideration on their behalf, so it was the easy way. Once the decision was made, it was a weight off my shoulders. I took some time (and placement advice included in my exit package) to decide whether I wished to return to work, but, despite a number of lucrative offers of interim management or consultancy positions, fairly rapidly decided that was it! Eight years on from that decision, I have absolutely no regrets (except that I should have done it a year earlier!). The years to 60 and the pension were bridged financially very easily (without touching any savings, and without compromising on "life") and as it happens, the vagaries of deferred defined benefit pension rules meant I didn't lose very much of the final pension at 60 either (the value in deferment rose almost as much as it would have in work!). The main factors in the decision for me are: - be clear what you are going to do going forward (or at least what your concrete options are) - ensure your financial viability - if you're going to 'retire', be confident you can fill your time - make sure the decision fits in with your partner's aspirations and work ...but really, my experience, and I've seen it in colleagues, is that there is a "light switch" moment when it suddenly just feels the right thing to do (given the above factors are all lined up). Depending on arrangements, it can be slightly advantageous to leave and receive payment early in a tax year, and don't underestimate the value of the first £30K of redundancy money being untaxed - it can be worth almost double at a "gross" level to a higher rate tax-payer. This comes from someone who has actively enjoyed about 80% of my working life, equably tolerated about 15%, and hated about 5% - but, I've always worked to live rather than lived to work. Retirement is the best job I've ever had! As it happens, the "new guard" lasted not long after I left (they were "found out"), along with most of the "clones" they recruited to back-fill the people they drove out. My particular nemesis was summarily escorted off the premises after a spat with the Board Member for HR in a meeting! ("don't bother clearing your desk").
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Post by Hofmeister on Mar 31, 2017 18:32:32 GMT
I read often about how your dogs know your feelings and moods, and empathise with you if you are not well.... I have man flu. A flu so bad you can not believe how bad a flu can be. I have a raging temperature, my glands are up, my throat feels like a family of hedgehogs are fighting down there, every bone and muscle aches. I feel like raging shit. This morning I managed to stagger to the chemist to purchase a mountain of Lemsip, and container loads of strepsils. I took th- e dog with me for a walk, In total about a mile. I made sure she was fed on time this afternoon Is she grateful, does she show empathy and sympathy with my plight? NO she is standing here scowling and snorting at me and generally being very disagreeable because I wont - no can't - play with her.
My wife has left me.
So excuse me if I am not in the mood to say retirement is great, frankly at this moment it SUCKS
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Post by tyrednexited on Mar 31, 2017 19:33:26 GMT
...I trust you don't mean permanently?.....
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Post by Hofmeister on Mar 31, 2017 19:39:00 GMT
...I trust you don't mean permanently?..... no its worse, she will be back, and she took the gin with her
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Post by tyrednexited on Mar 31, 2017 19:40:46 GMT
...I trust you don't mean permanently?..... no its worse, she will be back, and she took the gin with her Pity, I was going to point out the silver lining.....
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Post by Humph on Apr 1, 2017 7:39:44 GMT
Does everyone turn into a big Jessie when they get older? Hot toddy and bit of grip acquisition is all that's required. You'll be getting a Volvo next. Oh wait...
😜
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Ted
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Post by Ted on Apr 2, 2017 14:27:09 GMT
Dying is the last thing I intend to do ! No religion for either of us so I've already set my son and SiL the challenge to do the biz as cheaply as possible...SiL has a dark blue Berlingo van...that'll do nicely. Music ? Flanders and Swan ' the Slow Train ' mentions the station from where we used to get the 'hikers special' to Edale when I was a teen. Still my nearest rail, although trams now.
Last funeral was a month ago, 67 yr old biker mate with whom I shared many a hotel room or ferry cabin. Brain bleed leading to sectioning, dementia and death. My ex Ops Director has exactly the same, 1 yr younger than me and a keen walker and climber.
All the last generation are gone now so it'll our lot next ! I'm 71 now.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 2, 2017 21:53:42 GMT
My mother was ten years older than my father and their closest friends tended to be people my mother knew before her marriage and who never married. Gradually they all died off leaving my father who is now a fit and fairly active 82 with few friends locally. So he decided to move to Israel, where the weather is better, cafe society actually works and there are lots of people in a similar position to him, many being ex-pats English or English speaking. He has had a new lease of life; making lots of friends and keeping very busy although very very slowly his mental acuity is fading. He will still be independent for a few years more I hope.
However he has given me his wishes....not about him, as he will get buried in Israel, but about my mother, who he would like exhuming and transferring to the same cemetery as he will be in......! It's not unheard of in our community, but still pretty (extremely) rare. I'm still considering the matter but secretly hoping he returns to Manchester for a trip and pops it here - when the time is right of course. We will all miss him dreadfully when it happens.
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Post by Alanović on Apr 3, 2017 9:11:59 GMT
Close shave with a friend of 45 this weekend. He had a heart attack on Friday afternoon, has had emergency angioplasty, stent fitted. Blocked artery, apparently.
Fairly fit geezer, cycles a bit, active lifestyle but not a gym bunny.
Bit of a shock. Massive scare for him - he's only fairly recently married and has a 2 year old son. And his identical twin brother is off to the docs for a check up......
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