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Post by Humph on Jan 12, 2020 11:22:22 GMT
No biking today 🙁
Doing our our tax returns instead. 😰
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Post by Hofmeister on Jan 12, 2020 13:23:32 GMT
No biking today 🙁 Doing our our tax returns instead. 😰 Tax returns? Hmmm Money comes into the bank account, some of it is taxed PAYE at basic rate, some of it not at all. Lovely sunny day, off out for a dog walk.
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Post by EspadaIII on Jan 12, 2020 13:44:49 GMT
That's cruel, Hof.
Mine are being done by our accountant. Couldn't do ours without him.
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Post by Humph on Jan 12, 2020 13:46:23 GMT
Bleh ! Getting there...
😱
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Post by tyrednexited on Jan 12, 2020 14:33:14 GMT
...I'm just awaiting the next round of car downsizing posts.....
TBH, I hate doing my tax returns, but nowadays it is much easier than when I was working, and the online system works well for me*
*though, even rounding up and rounding down entirely in accordance with HMRC rules, I never get exactly the same results on my calculations as they do on theirs (usually very, very close though).
In the past, my tax affairs were somewhat more complex, and I generally found that HMRC were inclined to rule (or assume) very much in their favour, which led to some interesting exchanges, every one won by myself. I really did have to know my way around the tax system in the days of MIRAS, opting for separate taxation for SWMBO and myself, etc.
ISTR saying in the past on here that I gained my current walking companion a very large tax rebate going back several years as he didn't understand he could elect to have MIRAS entirely applied to his higher rate tax, rather than by default split equally between him and his wife (who wasn't on the higher rate). He really didn't believe me until he elected (and restrospectively as well) and it gained me a very nice bottle of wine as a thank you!.
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WDB
Full Member
Posts: 7,356
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Post by WDB on Jan 12, 2020 15:08:16 GMT
I’ve got three to do. Mine is easy — or will be when I can find the paper P11D with the right BIK value for my corporate medical insurance. But I also have to help each boy to one, thanks to a trust-related wheeze to do with my parents’ estate.
But i did most of the work over the new year break. And it was a nice(ish) morning, so I put in a muddy 20km on the bike.
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Post by Humph on Apr 13, 2020 18:46:48 GMT
A Scottish friend (who for complicated reasons, lives in Moscow,) sent me this, it’s only meant as joke of course...
An American photographer on vacation was inside Westminster Abbey taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read '£10,000 per call'.
The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.
The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for £10,000 you could talk to God.
The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Lincoln There, at the cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it.
He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in London and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.
She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for £10,000 he could talk to God.
'O.K., thank you,' said the American.
He then travelled to York , Durham and Liverpool
In every Cathedral he saw the same golden telephone with the same '£10,000 per call' sign under it.
The American, upon leaving the N of England decided to travel to Scotland to see if the Scots had the same phone.
He arrived in Glasgow, and again, as he entered the cathedral , there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read '50 pence per call.'
The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. 'Reverend, I've travelled all over England and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to heaven, but in England the price was £10,000 per call. Why is it only 50pence here?'
The priest smiled and answered, 'You're in Scotland now, son .... it's a local call.'
KEEP SMILING
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Post by tyrednexited on Apr 13, 2020 18:52:00 GMT
...well, you can try to appropriate Yorkshire jokes, but they don't work as well.....
Incidentally, God has been seen out and about (properly socially distanced - only the three of him) around Yorkshire in the last few weeks.
Working from home, apparently...
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Post by Humph on Apr 13, 2020 18:58:15 GMT
Well, you know what they say about Yorkshiremen?
“They’re Scots with all the generosity wrung out of them”
😉
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Post by tyrednexited on Apr 13, 2020 19:01:14 GMT
You can always tell a Yorkshireman.......
.....but you can't tell him much!
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Post by Humph on Jun 11, 2020 12:29:03 GMT
Wish I had a hamster, well, a lot of hamsters actually, spent days shredding old papers and there's still loads to go. Filled 4 bin liners and my recycling wheelie bin with shreds. Don't tell Al, but I might have a bit of a burn in my burny thing in the garden later.
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Post by Alanović on Jun 11, 2020 13:02:48 GMT
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Post by Humph on Jun 11, 2020 13:30:36 GMT
What? You don't like hamsters? 😉
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Post by Alanović on Jun 11, 2020 13:40:54 GMT
Not much meat on them. My dog's keen.
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Avant
Full Member
Posts: 691
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Post by Avant on Jun 11, 2020 22:38:20 GMT
This thread had me worried until I saw that the dates were 'Jan' rather than 'Jun'.
I need to pay some tax by the end of July.... a slightly better feeling of getting value for money this time, given the marvellous job that the NHS has been doing. I might even pay it a month early since the money is sitting there in my savings account earning a fraction of a percent.
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