7 years, 4 tyres, 3 mirrors, 1 set of brakes and a battery.

I don't really know why, but your post reminded me of this report...

I found it fascinating, but then I'm sad like that..........

www.licencebureau.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/road-use-statistics.pdf

Take a slap.

Do not confuse percentages with absolute numbers.

Bloody salesmen.

Don't you realise how we are increasing the value of your labours? Your way only you are making any money out of your work. Our way there's two of us making good money out your efforts. Doubling your value, that's what we do.

Bloody ingrates,

Consultants are so smart that not only do we add tremendous value with our innovative and valuable solutions, we also convince the CEO that it was what he wanted all along. We are often surprised that his own Management Team didn't come up with the idea, because if it wasn't completely bleedin' obvious we would never have found it..

Bloody incompetents.

And there you go, consultant at work. Nothing to do with the original problem, just generating a shed load of follow on non related consultancy to keep consultants in business

Just how many flags can one bloody yellow-sandaled Salesman wave?

I probably shouldn't, but I'm going to reply anyway....

Consider how the consultant is remunerated. We are *always* cheaper if you pay us T&M. You will always think we are cheaper if you pay us fixed price.

1) If you are paying me T&M and I want to earn profit, then I will have to find more work to do.
2) If you are paying me Fixed Price then to increase my profit I must do *less* work.

Neither are desirable, but in my experience it is easier to manage someone who is constantly asking to do more, than it is to manage someone constantly trying to hide the fact that they are doing less.

Reward me on achievement of the result you want. So if you're revenue growth over the next three years, then make my success payment dependent on that. Sure, you'll pay a bit more, but only if I'm successful.

"Fixed Price" is also "Fixed Scope". So unless you're a soddin' genius, in which case you wouldn't need me, you cannot possibly understand the scope of what I will need to do, so you're just laying the path towards endless change orders requiring more money, or endless failures to achieve success which will be provably your fault.

>>Their favourite ploy is to recommend getting rid of all the expensive ( aka experienced and useful ) people and replacing them with adolescents with obscure degrees ( aka cheap people with no relevant experience )

Totally your fault. You gave them a flat cost reduction target. What did you think would happen? They just did what you paid them to do and, in fact, contractually insisted that they should do..

>>This of course creates a scenario where, in the first year after that has been implemented, the company shows a significant profit increase because the old geezers had set up the trade for that year and the cheap adolescents haven't had time to lash it up yet.

Totally your fault. You gave them short term targets.

You should have related both to factors that mattered to you - time, revenue, profit, market share, profit per head, etc. etc. and then done it over a time frame which meant you knew it was a quality change.

You are using less intelligence, knowledge and common sense in choosing and contracting your consultants than you would use choosing your gardener.

You are probably using either a wannabe Director or a short term procurement manager to negotiate your contract.

>> The ones who aren't even good enough for that, don't, and then become consultants.

No doubt true in some cases. However, I'd rather have a corporate job, but the truth is that not only can you not afford me, it would be a ridiculous business decision to employ me, and you don't need me permanently anyway.

Typically stupid customers don't get great service.

Smart customers don't get saddled with idiot, worthless, know-nothing consultants.

Errr - what about Humphesses Qashqai? Three mirrors??? Even Espadrille ain't that bad and she's from London.